Zookeeper's Wife

I know I'm basically a year behind, but I'm a mom and I use that excuse widely. 

If you're looking for an emotionally, eye opening, heart wrenching, thought provoking movie look absolutely no further. The zookeepers wife proves to be all of the above and more. 

It has always been hard for me to imagine the Nazi era, but I have been working hard to educate myself over the last years to better understand the histories of people around me. I still struggle to wrap my mind around the ingrained hatred that worked to motivate Word War II, and honestly I don't want to understand it. But, I do want to understand what led to it so that I can be best educated in how to prevent this level of hatred again.

I recently read Small Little Things by Jodi Picoult, and it too opened my eyes to experiences of racism for PoC. While I may be "woke" to the reality of these things existing, I am privileged in the sense that it isn't my daily life. 

I can't help but take a step back and reflect. How am I actively working against hatred? How am I pursuing a society of equity? How will I continue to respond as the hatred seems to be more vocal, more blatant, and more celebrated than ever before in my short life? These are questions that are quite literally keeping me up tonight. This movie. Oh my heart. This REALITY of so many- these babies being loaded in a train to be killed because of their looks and their beliefs. And a family who risked their marriage, safety, lives, and children to help others. 300+ people were saved because of their sacrifice. What will I sacrifice? What do I sacrifice? How could it be more? 

Zero Dark Thirty

A couple weeks ago, Christopher and I watched the film Zero Dark Thirty. He had recorded it onto the DVR and we watched it one evening before he left for a business trip.  Though I read the description of the film I seriously had NO idea what I was getting in for.

The movie portrays the time between 9-11 and the killing of Osama Bin Laden (yeah, not a light topic for the day).  It shows the work of CIA operatives who were interrogating known accomplices of Bin Laden-- in pre no-torture days at that.  The opening scenes are some of the most repulsive scenes I have ever allowed myself to watch.  I felt nauseous, dizzy, and conflicted.

These operatives were doing their job, and doing it well.  They were in places such as Pakistan where they were hated on, threatened, shot at, and bombed in order to discover information that would lead to the eventual take down of Bin Laden.  That is medal-worthy work, people.  And thank GOD for the men and women (holla at you, kick ass girl in the movie)

But at the same time, their work was degraded, in-humane, and down right disgusting.  They were hitting, kicking, starving, depriving, water boarding and everything in between.  On top of that, they used tactics such as shaming, nudity, using dog collars and more to embarrras and strip away every last ounce of humanness from these individuals. 

Now, keep in mind, the individuals being tortured were likely terrorists. And I say likely because most of the people they are seen interrogating (torturing rather) were not necessarily terrorists but had been seen with a terrorist at one point or another.  A serious case of in the wrong place at the wrong time.

I was left with a deep sense of WHY? Why do we respond to hate (terrorism) with more hate (torture)? Why do we respond to cries for help (from those being tortured) with silence (or more pain infliction).  Why does it seem natural to inflict such pain, shame, and torture on any human being regardless of their crime?

Now I preface my reactions with the fact that I am not an eye for an eye type of person.  I believe in redemption and rehabilitation.  Would terrorists choose terrorism if they had other choices? I like to believe that they would NOT.  And I can appreciate that for the families who lost loved ones in any of the Al Queda terrorist attacks that it feels good knowing the men to blame were tortured, injured, shamed, and caused pain.  But I beg you to consider WHY that makes you feel better. Not because I judge you, not because it is wrong, but is that actually how you feel, and questioning your beliefs is never a bad thing.

Something that also struck me was that the movie critically proclaimed the "no-torture" rulings that Obama put in place.  It was so interesting for me (So so pro no-torture) to see this from the point of view of the people who had been doing the torturing. 

Lastly I will leave you with a link to an article about the movie that is much more eloquent than mine!

Sochi 2014

Is it just me or do these Olympics seem to have a different feel to them than years past? I don't feel the America loving vibe or the unity that the Olympics usually creates.  My coworkers and I have been talking about the Olympics all morning and Christopher and I have been watching them quite a bit.  That being said, I don't feel like I'm missing out when I don't catch something on TV. 

For one, it is hard to be on twitter during the olympics (something I remember from London 2012).  If you want to watch a race/competition and be surprised by who wins then DO NOT go on twitter during the day.  Every race I have watched so far, I have already known the outcome.  Not because I look it up but because my social media addiction makes it hard to not click on that little blue birdy.

Secondly, the scandals around Sochi are absolutely ridiculous.  From the man holes not being covered, the disgusting water, the hotels that are completely undone with wires hanging everywhere, and the list continues.  Just check this site.  It is pretty disgusting/scary.  I think when you see a country/city struggle so much to get things ready for the games it creates a sense of un-excitement.  How can you be pumped for the olympics when the olympics aren't ready for the games, athletes, and media? 

I also think that Russia in general has a lot to do with the lack of excitement for the Olympics.  One coworker was saying how bummed she would be as an athlete if that is where you were going to compete--now I personally wouldn't turn down a trip to anywhere on this Earth because I love to explore especially internationally, I do feel that Russia is not a top 10 destination on anyone's radar especially given the controversies in their nation.  Their anti-gay sentiments in particular leave me with a feeling of divided-ness, not unity, which is something I have always loved about the Olympics.  The fact that athletes have to "watch their backs" while their because of their sexual orientation makes me nauseous.  How on earth are we in 2014 and still do not love and accept all humans for their personhood?  It is mindboggling to me. 

Lastly, I think our world becomes more and more cynical and negative as time goes on rather than the other way around.  A lot of that likely has to do with how quickly news can spread and how much news is worth.  We can't find articles about the strides Sochi has made for the Olympics to take place because those don't exist.  It's not that they haven't made strides, but that negative news is more "exciting".

All of that being said- I love the Olympics and I love watching the competitions.  I still think the Summer games are much more exciting but watching people fly through the air on skis and snowboards is pretty fantastic. 

Working Woman

I have been working now for almost five months as a social worker with Children's Hospital--doing home visits through a prenatal through age three parent support and abuse prevention program.  And yes, I often get asked what I do.  Oh and yes, I often get told that "it must be nice to make your own schedule".  Oh and yes, I do often get told LOTS of things about what people expect my clientele to be like. 

It has been hard for me to internally balance what I see every single day through my job and what the media, pop culture, and even history have taught the public (and my friends and family) about who I am likely serving.  Not to mention, our highly divided country is becoming more and more difficult to navigate as my job requires me to help my families navigate the process of seeking assistance, enrolling in federal programs, and helping them understand that the lies the media and news speak of those who get assistance ARE NOT true. 

There- I said it- the way the news portrays my food stamps receiving, Medicaid getting, WIC assisted families is ABSURD, INACCURATE, HURTFUL, and SHAMING.

And these are some reasons why:

- Welfare Fraud is the main reason most people have negative views of welfare.  Why do you hear about welfare fraud? Because it is good news to report  to taxpaying viewers that their money is being wasted when one woman, for example, is claiming 38 children (who do not exist) getting benefits for all of them (this did happen).  It is also good news when women (recently in columbus) were selling WIC formula for cash.  (ask why sh
e did that? well she did that because she had extra left over and she thought it would be a good way to get cash for a beamer. Oh just kidding--to have cash to pay utilities). 

I am not applauding welfare fraud at all.  But the cases are few and far between the REAL benefactors of these programs (1.5-2.5% of cases).  The media can easily sell these stories because it helps the public continue to stigmatize and shame the users of these programs.

- Do you realize that even WITH benefits, most of the families I work with do not have beds to sleep on, do not have secured housing, do not have money left over for the momma and poppa by the end of the month, and often times do not have enough clothing for any of the family members.  My families are constantly having to rely on places that give out donations (did you know food pantries provide often expired food).  Just because a family is getting assistance does NOT mean they are living well.

- Medicaid is "free" medical coverage for women, children, families who fall below 100-200% of the federal poverty level (changes based on who you are and where you live).  Well, folks, if I were to get pregnant in the state of Ohio before I am married--my salary would qualify me for Medicaid.  Would I apply? HELL YES.  Why? Because it would guarantee me and fake baby the best of healthcare.  With my salary alone could I still get that with the Health coverage I have? Possibly, but mostly because I have a good fake baby daddy.  Alone I would not in any way.  Here's my point-- The benefits are available and it makes sense to use them-- they are designed to help families temporarily, and designed to make sure babies have the best start they can possibly get. 

- Something to remember is that while the programs are helpful, it can be nearly impossible to get out of the cycle of needing assistance. Why? Because the income levels are set so low that if you are even making minimum wage full time, your benefits will be stopped, likely including your childcare (title XX) benefits--making it impossible to still work and make that little.  You cannot raise a kid and pay all of your bills on that little with no assistance.


The families I work for represent the greater whole-- almost 40 million Americans recieve some type of assistance from the government.  And we as a country SHAME that to no end.  We make it seem like families are CHOOSING this life, and we also make it appear to be an enjoyable thing.  What is disgusting to me is what this really means for us as a whole: We shake our heads in disgust at the thought of helping other people-- children, moms and dads.  How awful is it that we as a nation do not want to take care of the people who are our next door neig
hbors, your kids peers, or the people sitting in the pew behind you.  We as a nation LAUGH at a president who has tried VERY hard to ensure these benefits for these families.  What does that make us as people? 

I always get told the "bootstraps" quote when I open this conversation--people just need to find a way to make things work.  But when babies are born into poverty, do not complete middle school (let alone high school or college), and may not even be able to read.  Tell me, how are they supposed to make things work without a little help?  Oh so they shouldn't have kids?  Well tell me, how the HELL are they supposed to learn about birth control if we keep it so god damn hush hush and keep shutting down our Planned Parenthoods and non-profit health centers. 

You can choose to belief what you would like.  But take a moment to think about what type of person you WANT to be.  What values do you WANT to convey to those around you? 

Pink does NOT equal Breast Cancer Treatment/Prevention

The month of October is my favorite time of year, I think.  I also REALLY love the dead of summer where it is blazing hot, everything is in bloom, and boating is the most frequent thing on my mind.

Anyways, October.  I love the leaves, the crunchy ones and the bright ones on the trees.  I love the beginning of boot and jacket season.  I love cozy fires, warm houses, and hot tea.  You know what I don't love? The stupid PINK Breast Cancer campaign. 

1. Not because I don't support breast cancer research.
2. Not because I hate Pink.

I hate it for several reasons

1. Why do we assume Pink=women=breast cancer.  Men get breast cancer too.  And lots of women hate feeling labeled by pink.
2. It feels SO inappropriate to me how many "save the tatas" "barbells for boobs" "booze for boobs" etc events there are.  We are not pouring billions into research for BOOBS.  We are researching for LIVES.  The women, the men afflicted by the disease.  Do we as a nation forget that most people with breast cancer LOSE their breasts?  How insensitive is it to be behind propaganda that FOCUSES on the boobs when a large percentage of these patients have LOST theirs. 
3.  The money. Oh the money.  Can we please consider, for a moment, that Donatos is donating only 25 cents each pizza from their pink-ness campaign.  I mean really?  Or that Nike only donates "a percentage" well what the fuck percentage friends?  Why are we willing to pay more for a pink product when so little is actually going to the cause? because it is popular! And who benefits-- BIG COMPANIES -- not women, men, or BOOBS.
4. There are few things I hate more than NFL Pink.  While I know it has raised funds, let's be real.  NFL could not be a more masculine setting and they are wearing pink for the boobs.  How much more Disney Princess -- the prince will rescue me can we get.  It is nauseating.  Not to mention the teams, Nike, Addidas, etc make millions off of making pink versions of their gear.  That money is not spent on research.  It's profit people. 
5.  Consumer philanthropy makes people lazy...they bought that pink spatula so now they don't need to volunteer, they don't need to donate to cancer research.  Well this is just crap.  I mean it's real, but it is also real stupid.  These color campaigns have led to LESS money in the hands of those doing the research because people believe they have already done their share.  Well the fact of the matter is that you didn't do your share...and people's lives actually depend on your assistance for researching better treatments and actual prevention.  

While I get that awareness is good--yes, everyone knows pink=breast cancer, this isn't the awareness we should be wanting.  We want money given to research institutes.  Money given to non-profits that provide cancer screenings, assistance for cancer afflicted families, and more.  This is what is NOT happening.

Lastly, my last rant is this: Why are we so focused on breast cancer when it isn't the most common? When it is NOT nearly the most deadly?  We have made excellent strides in treatment, but still know nothing about other cancers, like my mom's.  I can tell you why-- we are a sex obsessed culture.  Get this, the two most funded cancers? Prostate and Breast. This is no accident.  What is an accident is that all this pink stuff makes people believe breast cancer is their biggest risk of death, or even the most likely type of cancer they will get--but it IS NOT. 

What I beg of you is to 1. read this article by a breast cancer survivor.  and 2. please think twice before supporting every single companies pink campaign--and instead support research and non-profits actually doing the work. 

Social Justice Pump Up

So we (Christopher and I) are training for the Columbus Half Marathon.  Shocking, right? I don't think you could meet someone who hates running more than I do.  But it's going okay actually.  We did 6 miles this Saturday...and I actually did it! I would still rather swim 6 miles than run them, but I did it! Shockingly! And I am slow, like really slow, like I think most people walk faster than I "run", but I don't really care because I'm running.  and for long amounts of times and long amounts of distances.

Anywho.  How do I make it on these long runs you ask? Well I count songs.  Like a mile is 3 songs.  And  my six mile run on Saturday was 17 songs (and 3 pandora commercials and a break from when it wanted to boot me off for inactivity).  Pretty sweet, right?  Now I try to think of other things too so that I don't obsess over the countdown, but still, I count songs.  It gives me a visual when looking at distance/time covered makes me discouraged.

But some songs are like legit pumper-uppers, and other songs are just passing the time songs.  My favorite right now you ask? Same Love- Mackelmore and Mary Lambert!  Seriously an incredible song!

 "The right wing conservatives think it's a decision
And you can be cured with some treatment and religion
Man-made rewiring of a predisposition
Playing God, aw nah here we go
America the brave still fears what we don't know
And God loves all his children, is somehow forgotten
But we paraphrase a book written thirty-five-hundred years ago"

 "When I was at church they taught me something else
If you preach hate at the service those words aren't anointed
That holy water that you soak in has been poisoned
When everyone else is more comfortable remaining voiceless
Rather than fighting for humans that have had their rights stolen
I might not be the same, but that's not important
No freedom till we're equal, damn right I support it"

What incredible lyrics!  I mean seriously, we should be reminded of the fact that there is no FREEDOM for ANY of us until we can ALL experience FREEDOM.  And we as a society LOVE to turn our heads, our eyes, our ears, our hearts away from the reality of the hate that we have today, but it is UNDENIABLE.

Today in the news we see a judge FINALLY making a statement about New York search policy that has been applied mostly to the hispanic and black communitites.  FINALLY.  Our black babies are still DYING TWICE AS MUCH as our white babies (EVEN when we control for things like education level, income level).  What will it take for us to realize that HATE has consequences? That racism is ingrained into our minds and societies? That our freedom means NOTHING when other's cannot experience it?

In the news today we also hear of a STATE FAIR (Missouri) having a rodeo where there is an individual with an Obama mask, and the announcer was enticing the audience saying that the bull would run down Obama, take him down.  While the govenor has thankfully spoken out against this, how do you imagine black individuals in the audience feeling while watching a stunt like this? How do you imagine this display of racism is going to affect little minds that are just learning about the world? Because, let's not be ignorant, and finally recognize that it WILL Affect them.  

A Homeless Man, A Reminder

Last week when I was on one of my many bus rides of the week between the hospital and campus, I found myself on a bus with a man who was likely homeless.   When he got onto the bus, people moved away from where he was, and while this man did carry quite a stench with him, I was angry with the people who did this.  So, I started to talk to him.

Though I didn't have enough time to learn his whole life story, I was able to learn that he isn't from Ann Arbor, but found himself here because he thought people (family I think) here would help him.  They have not helped him, however, and he has been living on the streets for too long to keep track of, or so he said.  The man needed help finding 7-11, and since I was walking to my office on State St, I told him to walk with me and that he would be able to find it.  When we said goodbye the amount of gratitude that he expressed was simply unbelievable.  All I had done was offer humanity to this man, I did not judge, I did not fear, and I did not act oblivious to his needs.  I talked to him, I treated him how I would hope others would treat me if I myself were to be homeless.  He was kind, he was gentle, and he was lost.  But why?

In such a political time in our country, we are being bombarded with FALSE information on a daily (if not hourly) basis regarding what each presidential candidate can give us.  One thing that is TRUE, though, is that the Republican agenda would here about this man I tell you of and then stick up its nose, walk away, and whisper that he should help himself.  And if he can't help himself, then find a community resource that can.  In this agenda there is an assumption (well there are lots) that every human being has equal access to a prosperous life.  Well we KNOW this isn't true.  How are we all granted equal access to this is our education is not equal, if our kids are not made aware/taught about how to "help" themselves through education and better jobs?  Well we just aren't.  Our country's institutions are racist on a daily basis, kids from poor families with druggie mommy and daddy's are no longer getting benefits, and it's becoming harder and harder for minority populations to have a chance at making it "big and prosperous" even when they are educated about their choices.  And if you're wanting to argue with the racist comment, tell me why white people get organs more than minorities (even when controlling for any representation distributions).  Or tell me why black babies die 3 times more often in infancy than white babies.  Well you can't explain these things without acknowledging the research that points to institutionalized and experienced racism.

So why do I care?  Well I care for LOTS of reasons.  Being a social worker, I am COMPLETELY committed to fighting for social justice even if it is not the popular ideology.  I also care because this man is utilizing services right now, like shelters, food banks, and counseling, that will be taken away from him if Romney is put into office.  Government program cuts means our most vulnerable clients suffer. 

Yes I am ranting, but it is incredibly important.  So much of the media DOES NOT educate you on the implications of your vote.  Learn. Research. and vote. 

Once in a Life Time

This past Saturday in Chillicothe, Ohio, my parents' hometown, my aunt Becky and grandma hosted a bone marrow registration drive.  The event was an incredible success, with 149 registering to be donors and raising $2525 so far for the Be The Match organization.  You can still donate or sign up to register by going to marrow.org or by reading more about the event on my mothers blog at carepages.org.  But from my perspective, it was absolutely incredible to see so many people pour their time, sweat and tears into supporting my mom.  When strangers were showing up and friends were showing up after driving hours to get there it started to hit me just how incredible my mother truly is.

One of the trade offs of having moved around the world with my family is really not having a home town.  This weekend was the first time I really felt like that is something I would want at some point in my life, a home base that is.  I have loved moving so much, and am cringing at the fact that I have now lived in Michigan longer than I have lived anywhere else, but having a place to refer to as my home, and a place where I can count on to support me at the drop of a hat would provide a bit of security.  I have been asked a lot about how I would want to raise my own children; if I would want them to move around or if I would want them to have a home town experience and I really have no flipping idea.  But I do know that there are trade offs with both, and that if I have to live in one place forever it better be flipping fantastic!

Saturday taught us lots of things.  It taught us how incredibly respected my mama is, how adored she is by so many.  It taught us that lots of people are praying and hoping for her match to be found quickly.  It taught us that our family is ridiculously strong, showcased by the fact that my grandpa was at the event not 24 hours after getting out of the hospital.  And it taught us that Chillicothe is the definition of community, and we have great friends there who support our family.  I am grateful for all of these things!

#266: Seeing family that I hadn't seen in years this past weekend
#267: Seeing a smile on my papa's face
#268: Hugs from lots of people who know me, though I don't know them from Adam.
#269: Catching up with old friends, cousins, family.  It's so easy to feel comfortable around everyone.
#270: Feeling better!!
#271: The strength of community.

National Attention

A couple weeks ago I updated you all on my mother's recent diagnosis with MDS, a bone marrow cancer.  I wanted to offer a brief update on where things are standing now.

They tested my siblings and I, my uncle, and my Nanny (grandma) to see if any of us were matches to my mom.  None of us were.  They have yet to find a 10/10 match for my mother.  They have found a few 9/10 but we are still hoping for a 10/10 as the success rates are higher with a perfect match. 

In efforts to find this perfect match, my mom's sister (Becky) and mother (nanny) planned a bone marrow registration drive in Chillicothe, OH this upcoming Saturday.  We are ALL also pushing/encouraging people to sign up to be on the registry by going to marrow.org and requesting a kit to be sent to your house.  So many people are in need of a transplant (roughly 10,000 people at any given time).  Almost half of those struggle to find matches.  Let's change this by registering and encouraging people to register! It's only a blood donation, no surgeries, no long hospital stays!

Today, Robin Roberts announced that she too has MDS.  We (my mom's friends and family) are trying to get national attention for this drive, and bone marrow donation in general.  If you follow my twitter page then you saw lots of tweets about this, and if you're on my facebook, then you saw lots of posts about this.  Please share this incredible article about my mom and her family with others, and please use social media to spread the word on her behalf. 

#261: The power of social media.
#262: So grateful that my mom is a fighter, from a family of fighters.  We don't give up (see last post ;)) and we won't stop fighting for those we love.
#263: Health insurance.  And the health insurance reform.  Eternally grateful for quality care and excited to keep fighting for equal care in our country.
#264: Inspiration.  It comes from the strangest places, graduation speakers, long conversations, simple texts. 
#265: Having a madre who knows what to do for bad burns from the oven! But not so grateful for the burn!

Happy Earth Day!

Happy Earth Day!! I thought I would share the pretty cute Google Decorations in celebration of our Earth. 

The more exposure I have to cancers, illnesses, and ailments, I am reminded over and over again of how much we have polluted our beautiful planet.  Our industrialization, greed, and thoughtless actions have led to a sick planet and lots of sick people.  So what do we do now?

Well, we change.  "Be the change you wish to see in the world".  So, stop buying highly processed foods.  For example, pink slime, which is in most ground chuck, fast food meat, etc, is waste meat sterilized with AMMONIA.  Yeah, that's a known carcinogen.  So don't eat it.  Use your consumer power and put your money where your mouth is.

Grow your own food.  Help and support the initiatives of others to grow their own food.  Buy local, organic produce. 

A nutritionist once told me to only eat foods that are either organic or have less than 5 ingredients.  It's hard.  Try it. 

Consider your carbon footprint.  How do you get from a to b?  Who do you take with you? How can you be more environmentally friendly to protect the futures of your children and mine?

#225: The beauty that is spring time.  Blooming flowers, more sunshine, bright skies.

#226: The realization that I have so much to be grateful for.

#227: Being done with my first year of grad school.

#228: ALMOST done with my first semester of students.  Here's to hoping the grade whiners fizzle out. 

#229: Lots of relaxation time with family. 

#230: Two naps in one day.

#231: Getting closer to seeing the man I love.  Three weeks is simply too long.

#232: Clean laundry after six + plus weeks of not doing laundry.

#233: Puppy Cuddles

#234: Yoga

#235: Doing downward dog with Scarlet.  For reals.

#236: Great breakfasts with friends.  Saying goodbye isn't my fortay...but saying good luck is :)

#237: Music to match my mood.  Country music can put words to my feelings and emotions much better than I can.

#238: Baby smiles, baby giggles, baby cuddles, and simply baby time.

#239: Knowing that my words do not suffice in my expressions of love.

#240: Days off to sleep in, cuddle, relax, shop, and eat.

#241: Chocolate.  And LOTS of it.

#242: Bright Spring/Summer clothes!

#243: Bikini Season.  It's so dreaded for lots of (superficial) reasons.  But I am excited.  It means boating season. 

#244: Growth. 

#245: Love. Hugs.

Celebrate Earth Day however you want.  But think critically about how you treat your home.  And how you treat all of our futures. 

Autism Awareness Day

Just last week a report came out that found that 1/88 children is affected with ASD (Autism Spectrum Disorders).  Researchers postulate that the dramatic increase is a result of better diagnostic tools, and our ever changing environment. 

My current internship has me working so closely with those with Autism and their families, and it is such a difficult disorder to treat.  Not because of the disorder, because I assure you that these kids are incredibly easy to love...but educating parents, peers, and the public about the disorder is so hard!  People are resistant to accommodating others.  Our culture is incredibly resistant to broadening the scope of "normal".  We refuse to normalize, for example, handicaps, mental impairments, mental health, homosexuality, and the list goes on.  Why?

With my students, the most important thing I tell them every week is to question everything you see, read, hear, and experience.  Question the status quo, question the way things are, and never take the tried and true phrase of "well that's just the way it is...." as a good enough explanation.  We decide our culture and societies' future.  And our generation can use this power for good, or we can choose to not take advantage of this power at all. 

So on this day, April 2, 2012, wear blue.  Celebrate the children with ASD.  Love on them.  And teach and educate the public about how we can widen our scope of normalcy to accommodate more people and children.

Anthony, my favorite 7 year old, taught me about how motivating the ever so popular fun. song can be.  He told me how proud he is of being young after belting out this song one morning.  Let's be proud of who we are in efforts of giving others the opportunity to be proud, as well.


In support of Autism Awareness, please support Judson Center Autism Connections by eating at Pizza House in Ann Arbor between 10:30 am Wednesday and 4 am Thursday.  Proceeds will help those with Autism attend summer camps and social skills groups. 

#191: Weekends with this really great man I know. 
#192: Cuddling with the cutest puppy around.
#193: The look on the boys' faces this morning when I walked in to their house.  Between dogs and kids, I always feel loved!
#194: Music to match my mood at any moment.
#195: Really good doctors, advanced medicine, and the ability to treat our loved ones.
#196: Gluten free, dairy free, corn free, egg free, nut free FOOD.  When it actually tastes good.
#197: This semester, and my entire first year of grad school, is almost over!  All graded work is turned in, just riding out the rest of classes
#198: Almost done with my students this round!  Ready for them to move on...not that I don't love (some of) them
#199: Comfy beds, warm blankets, warm sunshine, cuddles and lovin's
#200: Lots of things to look forward to this year.  I am excited for everyday.

Happy 200!

Welcome to my 200th post, world!

#165: making it to 200 is impressive because I don't like sticking with things.
#166: hot tea for a sore throat.
#167: puppy cuddles on a sick day
#168: the opportunity and freedom to say "i love you" whenever i want.
#169: giggling is appropriate, cherished, allowed, and revered in my country.
#170: summer clothes shopping has now been made possible since our clothing stores like to start seasons WAY in advance

We have discussed politics, religion, love, death, gratitude, and yes, even underwear.  You have learned about my joys and my sorrows, my friends and my family.  But really, all of us are still pretty unsure about what this blog's purpose really is. 

Mostly, it serves as on outlet for my political, feminist, and liberal ideas.  Not only that, but it allows me to discuss current events, be radical, or just be personal and fluffy (ie, underwear).  I share my life with the goal of impacting anothers'.

I have readers all around the world, and what I love about that is when they contact me...which is oh so seldom, I might add.  Honestly, I used to think that my international readers were simply computers or creepy silly robots.  And maybe some of them are.  But others are women (and men) who somehow (I don't know how) came across my blog full of rants.

One woman emailed me and thanked her for offering a woman's perspective on violence.  She said that where she is from violence is expected for women.  It is never talked about, and never a crime.  She said she dreams of a life where those who hurt her friends (and her) can be punished for what they do....let's dream of that with her.

I tell you this story mostly because I need to think of my rants and raves as serving a purpose.  I may talk about underwear some days, and the Kardashians on others.  But what truly matters is that a single life, even if only one, has been touched by something on this silly blog.

The personal is political.

 

Days Off

#147: Days off, at home, are few and far between.  I am grateful for a FULL Friday and Saturday of laying around, catching up on sleep, hittin the gym, and attempting to catch up on homework.
#148: Speaking of the gym...it had been awhile.  Grateful to go to a gym with LOTS of windows that overlook a beautiful lake..
#149: A non-frozen lake, may I add!! The weather in Michigan has been incredible.  Sunny, bright, and not freezing!!
#150: Though grading papers is sucking the life out of me, I am making progress!

Today I really realized how incredible my life truly is.  I was reminded of all of the privilege that I experience on a daily basis.  In sections last we, my students discussed whether or not they could be grateful for the privileges they have.  I think we can be grateful...but part of that gratitude has to translate in to working to help ALL people experience these privileges. 

So on a beautiful day like today, I spent time reflecting on how I dream of a day that your access to education, high paying jobs and health care no longer depends on your ethnicity, race, geographic location, or your gender.  I am working towards this dream by educating you all on the fact that these things DO impact access to resources and opportunities...

Check out the video series Unnatural Causes if you don't believe me...

This is but the trailer to six hours of research...

Planned Parenthood vs Susan G Komen

It all began just a few days ago when Susan G Komen spokewoman announced that as of April 1, 2012, Planned Parenthood would receive no funding from their organization.

Then the country cried out on behalf of the women that are served by Planned Parenthood.  And videos like this were created...

And women and men around the country used their voices to support such a powerful organization. 

And Then...articles like this came out today.  Komen came back and said that PP will still be eligibale for grants, even if they don't receive them.  Still shitty, really, but a better move.  The best part was that they admitted to falling in to the political warfare rather than supporting women. 

#141: Women should not be stigmatized for having sex.  It's a part of life.  I am honored to go to class every day with the people in the video above. 
#142: I like that we can laugh while we fight for the cause of women's health.  "Don't fuck with 'em, Don't fuck without 'em"
#143: A day off to enjoy being lazy and get caught up has been incredible. 
#144: While I am struggling to get through all of my grading...I recognize how grateful I am for playing a huge role in these students' academic careers. 
#145: Feeling honored, loved, cherished today.
#146: My snickerdoodle is one year old today!!!!!!  I love this puppy so much :)

Body Image

Have you ever thought about why women are so much more likely to develop an eating disorder than men are? What made this to be?

In Women's Health, I ask my students to consider where they learned about being a woman and where they learned about what "good" women look like. Most students report that they learn these things from the media, magazines, Victoria's secret and other fashion stores. If this is true, what do these places teach us?

To be sexy, to congratulate being dangerously thin, to be scantily clad and to present your body as a pleasure island for the men around you.

We congratulate people for losing weight without knowing how they're going about losing the weight. You don't have to be 70 lbs to be anorexic. Yet we never question the healthiness of our means because being thin is so important.

I have skipped meals, skipped weeks of eating and have stood in front of mirrors for hours marking every imperfection. My teenage years are a blur of disappointment. My body was never good enough for me, so seeing that it was good enough for men was my only boost of self confidence.

I tell you this because I am taking a political stand for the bodies of women and for the health of women. It is not about being liberal or conservative, but instead about wanting all women to love the way they look, an celebrate other women for how they look, too.

Use your voice. The personal is political.

Bullying

I admitted a few months ago on Blogger that I love the Kardashian's.  Well since that post, KimK ended a 72 day marriage, KourtneyK got knocked up, and Kourtney and Khloe take NY 2 began.  Surprisingly, the Kardashian sisters have been involved in something incredibly positive in the past few days, too.

The Kardashian sisters went on Extreme MakeOver: Home Edition to support a family whose children had suffered greatly from bullying.  Though bullying has been receiving lots of attention lately in the media with the rise of bullying-related suicides, bullying is still both rampant and detrimental for children and youth.

Watch Jonah's Story.  He is full of honesty, brokenness, strength, and triumph.  His story is moving, powerful, emotional, and inspirational.  Join me in lifting his struggles and pain up to the One who can impact his life.

#89: I am grateful to be at a place in my life where I can be confident without being cocky, myself without being afraid, and free without feeling judged. 

#90: Celebrities are a confusing population to me.  They get paid to live their life, basically.  Though movie stars or musicians get paid for their goods/works, what made the Kardashians famous?  Despite this weird-ness, I am grateful that their fame and the fame of others is doing good in some ways.  Many ways, even.

#91: Christmas is upon us.  Though that means materialism, Hallmark, and money in many ways; it also means donating to those in need, making Christmas happen for families in need, and spending time decorating the house for the holidays.  I love this season.

Social Justice

Justice is a "hot" topic right now...it's in TV shows (grey's last season with Alex's project), on billboards and most definitely in churches and classrooms.  Part of the National Association of Social Workers Code of Ethics is to work towards social justice in everything we do, and this is something I learn about, both practically and big picture, on a daily basis.

I am working on a couple of big papers right now.  One of them is about me (a genogram basically) and one is about connecting course (welfare) work to one of the "competencies" of the NASW.  Social justice is the easiest to connect to any of my courses because SO many things are unjust...

Social Security isn't available until your 65 (or 62) but African Americans have a much shorter life span on average; therefore they receive less of what they paid earlier in life than say Asian women who have the longest life span.

Higher education (public at least) was intended to allow anyone to become as educated as they want; the poor were able to go to school just as the wealthy were.  In current times, however, both the federal and state budgets have drastically affected the funding on ALL education programs, rising tuition costs and cutting the amount of available financial aid funds.  Now, higher education is only for those with the means to get there, which often excludes the less wealthy and disproportionately excludes select ethnic groups.

 Our tax codes are completely messed up, if you didn't already know that.  We give tax cuts to billionaires and some cuts to those making less than 20K/year, but almost no cuts to the average earning American ($20-60K).  This makes it incredibly difficult for many Americans in so many ways.  Instead of taxing people proportionate to income, we tax (Read:PENALIZE) people for working a honest job making 30K a year instead of helping those families make ends meet.  And considering the last point about education, how are these families supposed to get an education leading to a better job?  And who is to say that education would even mater right now?

Basically the world is a mess. Politics are messy.  And our country (and largely the world) is in such a devastating economic situation that we have no attention being given to these justice issues outside of grassroots movements.

How will you help?

Remembering the Moment

September 11, 2001 is a day that everyone old enough to remember, does remember.  I remember the raw emotion, watching the 2nd plane hit, watching the towers fall, and watching the Pentagon and field in Pennsylvania go up in flames and smoke.  I remember the people around me, the tears, the phone calls and the intense fear that we all began to feel as more and more things unfolded on the screen in front of us.

I was living in Buenos Aires, Argentina at the time.  In some ways that made us feel safer...the attacks are in America, we are not in America.  However, the 9/11 attacks spurred other terror cells to make threats against American buildings and people in many foreign countries, including Argentina.  Our school and embassy were threatened.  Our schools became guarded not just by security guards, but by guards with machine guns (loaded).  We had to sign in and out of school grounds.  And personal safety was always on the minds of our parents.

Where were you?  Are you still able to engage with the emotion that the day evokes for so many?  I was able to spend some time today watching the memorial services that took place in DC, New York and Pennsylvania.  I was moved to tears several times.  And though I didn't know, personally, any of the 2,977 victims that died that day, I am emotionally distraught over the pure evil that sparked such an attack, moved by the outpouring of love and support in this country, moved by the tears of family members, and moved by this thing called life that we so often take for granted.

As this 10th anniversary comes to an end I am thankful for my life.  I think of so many things that could have claimed my life thus far, and of how truly blessed I am.  Just last year on September 11th I was in a rollover car accident.  Not only did my friend and I walk away with our lives, but with no broken bones or chronic injuries.  Each life is precious, each life is important, and each life has a purpose.  This weekend has truly reminded me of this. 

Planned Parenthood

Lucky for me, I was able to both meet and hear the President and CEO of Central and Southeast Michigan Planned Parenthood speak on Monday.  Saying she was an incredible speaker would be quite the understatement.  I have long supported this organization (willing to accept backlash) because they are unafraid to support the women that so many other health clinics turn away. 

Did you know that 95% of the services rendered at PP are healthy-women exams such as pap smears, gyn exams, breast exams, pre-natal care?  Did you know that they will never turn away a woman OR man who walks in their doors looking for pregnancy or STD testing or even both?  Did you know that PP has an educational component that teaches TRUE (accurate) information about pregnancy, contraception, abortion and female-body care? 

I recognize that so many people are passionately against abortion and this right that women have.  I myself am not a huge fan; BUT I would much rather women have a safe place to go to like PP than to have to turn to back alley/coat hanger/dangerous methods.  I can't convince everyone to believe what I believe, but I can support a movement that will keep women safe! 




Every woman who seeks an abortion does so for her own personal reason.  HER reason is NOT political; it's personal and very well thought through.  Abortion is not something to take lightly, and isn't taken lightly because of the required counseling and questioning.  What are your reasons for supporting anti-choice or pro-choice movements?  Is it wise to say "never"?